#NSS學校
[guest] 話說最近我個班有個人生日,我唔係好鍾意佢,但佢同我最好嘅frd呢排唔知點解熟咗,我個frd因為佢生日放咗我同其他人飛機陪佢去慶祝生日,仲要本身慶祝嗰日已經唔係正日
原本都唔關我事,我個frd過嚟仲要問我佢哋嗰日去邊度好,同埋佢哋去嗰個地方因為我去過,佢仲問我啲門票點買,其實我真係好難受,我生日嗰陣時佢就同我講咗句生日快樂,約佢嗰排咁岩又考試,原本有講之後再補返,但一直冇咗件事
其實都唔係第一次,仲要因為另外幾個同我唔係咁熟嘅,但有認識嘅人移民,佢哋請咗全班同隔離班一共有20幾個人一齊去歡送會,我身邊啲朋友都有被邀請,但就係冇叫我,原本我都冇乜所謂,甚至知都唔知,但又係我嗰個最好嘅frd走過來同我分享佢哋嗰日嘅活動,我唔知佢知唔知我冇份去,但反正我係隔離聽到好難受
我覺得我份人唔係好識經營一段friendship,尤其是係我哋班真係好攰,每個小息佢哋就圍埋一堆,喺度聯誼,但其實我乜都唔想理,就想自己坐住做自己嘢,但試過一排之後就會發現你唔聯誼根本冇朋友,可能會有人話冇朋友咪冇朋友囉,但我又做唔到咁孤獨,之前小學嗰啲又係因為我唔鍾意聯誼,識咗好多年後尾都冇咗聯繫,就只係間唔中喺IG動態見到佢分享生活
我真係想知呢個係我問題定係佢問題?我而家係身邊嗰啲所謂朋友都冇乜幾個可以分享自己嘅事,所有嘢都唔我想比佢哋知,大部份都係喺學校傾偈拖晒手咁,但返到屋企完全冇聯繫,我最後嗰個frd佢又好擅長交際,原本中一同佢friend到而家,但佢越來越多friend,甚至原本一個佢終日淨係同我講嘅秘密,去到鍾意已經好多人都知,雖然係佢嘅嘢,但我覺得佢當時同我講嘅秘密,又係咪真係咁秘密呢?我變到好似有少少可有可無,甚至一直覺得佢係我最好嘅frd,但我覺得我應該唔係佢最好嘅friend,有時候打開IG見到動態入邊嗰啲超級close 既friendship 會好羨慕